Well..

This year started out pretty decent but I'm getting sucked down again. I just want my court shit to be over with but now I have all these motions that probably won't get carried out even if I try to look like a college student which I am not. Now I must interrupt. What is it with people and them wanting me to go to school? I have too much shit on my plate to even think about school. I don't see myself doing it anytime soon.

I'm already bored with this. I'm really bored with life. I'd like to just say fuck it and run away so they can't find me but I'd still be as lonely as ever. All I want is someone I can trust that won't run away but I can't even do that anymore. Evan ruined it. Oh boy, did he. It's what brings me down.. My therapist gets it. She told me to consider meds but I don't want to have to rely on meds to make me happy or keep me at a level. I don't think I need them, really. I just have something that needs fixing and then I can go on with my life. Live how I've always wanted to live. Would love to get out of Portage too. By deciding to spend less time with my friends I enjoy them more. They're just better in small doses. I'm sure they'd say the same about me but I more or less just bore them. Whatev.